Top Five Captures And Other Things...

I am sitting here blanking, staring at silent Nevilles. Since my last bite, the blackberries have ripened and withered. Conkers, acorns and crab apples have crashed onto the winding syndicate paths and the leaves have turned from green to every shade of red, yellow and gold. But, as another winter takes a grip on the Fens, I’m not wasting my time, I’m busy in the bivvy, cogitating on the need for a carping mantra, learning about the possibility of attracting carp with music and more importantly, nailing down my top five UK carp captures of all time.

Your top five captures list is not something to be casually dashed out over one or two brews. It’s a ten-brew project at least. So, fellow CARPologists, after emptying the gas canister and my stash of Yorkshire tea bags, here’s mine: 

1. Jason Hayward: The Black Mirror, 46lb 4oz, The Mere, 1992

2. Peter Springate: A brace of 38lb 8oz and 36lb 8oz mirrors, Yeoveney, 1978 

3. Terry Hearn: Mary at 55lb 13oz, Wraysbury, 1996 

4. Nigel Sharp: The Burghfield Common, 52lb 12oz, 2006 

5. Gary Bayes: Two-Tone, 61lb 2oz, Conningbrook, 2001 

I know, I know, some of you will think it’s heresy not to have Richard Walker’s 44 and Chris Yates’s 51 in the top five, but it’s my list. You can have your own. I loved those captures, top ten for sure, they shook up the world and inspired me, but it’s a very small pond, so however groundbreaking, weren’t the chances of catching them pretty high? I also find it hard to forgive Richard for transferring the 44 from Redmire to London Zoo. Sorry, I can sense the daggers coming out! Anyway, as far as other historical captures that fired my imagination, the one that I’ve put on the list is Sir Pete and his epic Yeoveney brace. An awesome piece of angling that still stands up today. It also helps that the photos taken were all-time ultra-cult carp classics. 

Talking of which, the photos of Terry with Mary were classics too, and back in the 90s, Wraysbury was the Everest of UK carping, so to catch the record from there blew everyone’s minds. 

Fast-forward ten years and Burghfield had replaced Wraysbury as the ultimate challenge, so Nigel Sharp’s awesome five-year campaign for ‘The Common’ kickstarted an obsession with that fish that still dominates the UK carping scene. 

Two-Tone was a notoriously tricky carp to catch, so when Gary Bayes captured it from the iconic Kent venue, Conningbrook, it was a new record and I think, the first UK carp to weigh over sixty pounds. Nuff said. It had to go on the list. 

And having thought long and hard about what to put at number one, I finally went for Jason Hayward and his capture of the biggest unknown UK carp at the time: The Black Mirror. This legendary fish had it all, and only the most obsessive and determined carpers could hack the obstacles to fishing the Mere. For me, it symbolises everything that is adventurous and epic about carp angling. 

So, rather than adding extra flavour to our baits, could a musical rig improve catches? Maybe instead of white chocolate or tutti frutti, you might choose between Ed Sheeran or Adele. The Fat Lady from St Ives would clearly have loved Fat Bottomed Girls. How about the Burghfield Common? I’m guessing that cunning beast may be partial to some jazz, maybe a bit of Giant Steps by John Coltrane or Kind of Blue by Miles Davis. And the Mere’s Black Mirror would most likely have been a sucker for something hardcore—Black Sabbath maybe, or Marilyn Manson. Now that really would be dark side!

Anyway, before I sign off, here are a few words of advice: 

1. Don’t waste money buying expensive binoculars, simply stand closer to the object you wish to view. 

2. Always keep an empty carton of milk in your bivvy in case someone wants black coffee. 

3. And finally, remember that a balanced diet is a bacon sandwich in each hand!